As I have been overwhelmed with comments on my pregnancy announcement, many of which I haven’t read until now, I thought I will introduce you to my son and share my birth story .It makes me feel guilty that I haven’t shared my journey with you due to needing a break from blogging.
Pregnancy for me was never easy. I had to quit work because I was very anaemic. I didn’t have many symptoms such as sickness but I had anaemia and low blood pressure throughout my first and second trimester. The third trimester came and I finally started showing and looking pregnant, I had very good core muscles, HAD being the main word haha, but up until then part from my anaemia I had a fairly easy pregnancy compared to others.
I got to 36 weeks pregnant I had a general check up with my midwife, she examined my stomach and she was pretty certain that he wasn’t head down and was in fact frank breech. If you don’t know what frank breech is then here’s a photo of what he would have looked like.
I was booked in for a scan at 37 weeks at a hospital to see if he had turned and if not I would either had to get him turned which is known as ECV, have a C-section or try and give birth anyway which wasn’t medically advised. At 37 weeks the nurse found that he hadn’t turned and because I had good core muscles with little amniotic fluid if an ECV was done he would either not turn or just pop back again.
I did a TON of research, much to my consultant’s dismay I chose to have a C-section. I went with what my gut was telling me (which is always right every time) and I just had this awful reason that my son wasn’t turning for a very good reason and to have him turned with the huge risks it comes with didn’t sit right with me. And to have a natural birth with huge risks that came with it didn’t sit right with me either. So there was it my natural water birth with no pain relief full of rainbows and smiles that everyone seems to talk about went completely out of the window. I could have gone along with what made my consultant happy and possibly have the rainbows and smiles but it wasn’t about him, it wasn’t about me or my selfish idealistic birth that I had painted in my head. It was about what was best for my unborn baby. The decision was left in my hands which I found extremely difficult giving that I never had surgery and was scared of needles.
The day came for me to have my C-section. I had a canula in my hand after the second attempt when the student nurse burst my vein! Myself and Jamie were both prepped for theatre. I had to go in the horrible cold theatre all on my own and sit and have a long needle put into my spine which is known as a spinal block to numb the majority of my body. They pumped various different drugs into me many of which I can’t remember because of the drugs. My memory goes hazy after that happened so the rest of this post may sound short but sweet.
The team laid me down and checked if i was numb and made the first cut, Jamie was then allowed to come in the room we was both balling our eyes out during the whole c-section. I felt ALOT OF hard tugging and pulling which made me feel sick. Eventually Archie Peter Robb was born on the 20th of September 2016 at 11:18 am with a very good set of lungs on him! He cried almost straight away. The midwife took him somewhere to check everything was okay with him (procedure when you have a c-section in the UK). I was then shaking vigorously which is apparently normal but I thought I was dieing and started to panic. (you can imagine how traumatising this all was for someone with severe anxiety) eventually Jamie came over with Archie looking so proud balling his eyes out and that was the first time I saw my son. The moment I will never forget and one of the moments I can actually remember clearly throughout the whole thing!
One of the many reasons as to why I had stopped blogging for so long was due to my long ongoing battle with depression and anxiety.
You are probably thinking wow another person? Because there are so many people who claim to have mental health issues who probably haven’t been diagnosed because the past couple of years its become some sort of fad and some people find it “cool”. There is nothing cool or amazing about actually living with a mental illness and for those of us that do find it rather offensive when teenagers flippantly just use the word anxiety and depression in their everyday vocabulary such as- “looking at the man doing that gives me anxiety” “doing homework makes me depressed”. Depression and anxiety aren’t feelings they are illnesses.
Both these illnesses are what I have been battling since I was a child and it wasn’t until 2 years ago that I beat depression but my anxiety is still there and after a lot of trial and error only a few days ago I finally found medication for it that is right for me. I have had counselling and therapy which only helped to a certain extent, I haven’t had any panic attacks since going through cognitive behavioural therapy but the anxiety is still there due to various traumatic events which I may open up about in another post if any of you request it. To be honest I don’t think any amount of therapy or lifestyle change will make it go away that’s why as a last resort I have turned to tablets.
It’s not just being around other people and crowds ,which people stereotype anxiety to be, I even get anxious in my own home which makes my anxiety quite severe the only time I feel safe is when my fiance is home which is for 2 days every 2 weeks as he works round the country. I have lost a lot of my friends and family due to my mental health so Jamie being home is my safe place because hes one of the few that understand and takes care of me. Luckily since taking my new pot of tablets I feel like I may finally be what people consider normal again. It’s a very strange feeling as I can’t remember the last time I felt this relaxed.
And for those of you who may be worried that you or somebody else may have anxiety I have listed below the main signs and symptoms.
- Excessive worrying
- Panic attacks
- Feeling Dizzy
- Loss of appetite
- Avoiding places and people
- Compulsive behaviour
Just remember these are just a handful of symptoms, some of these symptoms may be caused by something else so please don’t assume, instead speak to your GP and they can refer you to the right person.
Thank you for reading the short version of why I have been away for so long. If you would like me to elaborate and talk more about this topic then feel free to comment below.
So, for the past 2 years or so I went a bit awol. I took a long break from posting on my blog.
The past 2 years I have moved house twice, had a baby and battled some health issues. I also took a year out of my uni degree so instead of going into my fourth year I am going into my third. Now things are back on track I have revamped my blog. I am still going to keep my old posts because I can’t bring myself to delete them!
Now I have grown and become a mother, my blog posts are going to be a bit different. There will be less beauty and more posts about my life and family. I hope you all will take this change positively and support my new style of blogging.
I can’t wait to get back into the swing of things!
Much Love, Becca-Anne
Hello everyone! I’m so excited to share with you that I am 12 weeks and 3 days pregnant and due on the 23rd of September which may explain as to why I have been so unactive on here for a while! Along with feeling happy and excited to meet my little baby have come with a few problems.
All the way through my first trimester my blood pressure has been very low leading to me feeling exhausted and dizzy all the time, I have also fainted a couple of times at work which has been pretty scary. I have now had to quit my job as I can not cope with meeting the demands they required and stand for long periods without feeling faint. I want what is best for me and my baby and to try to have a steady pregnancy as I am only 5ft2 and have a small frame.
Although I have been struggling, I am now starting to pick myself up so you should be expecting plenty of pregnancy posts, updates and baby hauls which I am super excited to do!! I hope you are all as happy and excited as I am and looking forward to going through the incredible journey of me becoming a mother.
Take care & lots of love
Not sure if anyone of you have noticed but I haven’t been very active on my blog for a short while so I thought I would give you guys an explanation so you know I am still alive haha.
I am currently in my second year at University so I have been doing a lot on catch up on my studies then I also fell ill and caught a flu virus which I am still getting over now. Once I am feeling up to it I will have new posts up straight away and also the ones which I have been tagged to do.
Also I thought I would let you all know that I now have a boyfriend called Jamie who is currently nursing me back to health, bless him! We met not too long ago and have really hit things off. He knows about my blog and he is very supportive of the things I do 🙂
So everything is going really well and I am very happy, minus being ill! I hope you are all very understanding and are looking forward to seeing new posts on my blog.
I thought I would share with you proof of what an amazing community the blogging world is. And how lovely you all are to me 🙂
I first commented on a girl’s blog post who made these super cool book marks and joked that mine wouldn’t turn out as good as hers. So she said she would send me one and let me choose which monster I would like. I have been so excited for it for arrive and it finally came!
Honestly how cute is this!!! I know it is only a book mark but the thought behind the fact that a person who I haven’t been speaking to for long went out of her way to make me one of these warms my heart. It’s the small things isn’t it? If everyone was to do at least one nice thing for someone everyday the world would be a greater place.
You should check out her post on how to make these super cute book marks and be sure to give her a follow, she is such a sweet girl and has a great blog – DIY Bookmark Monsters
Thank you so much Morgan!
Lots of love
Hello everyone 🙂
So a few days ago I decided to place an order on superdrug as I needed a few things. But as usual with me being addicted to make up and beauty products before I knew it I bought half of the shop! This happens to me every time I’m not kidding, is anybody else also guilty of this?
On the plus side I get to try out some new products, when I have tried everything I am going to share with you my most and my least favourite product from this order so keep your eyes peeled! I am so excited like a child in a sweet shop! Haha.
Also I would like to say to my followers that I am sorry for not posting for a few days I have been so super busy with work! But a new post shall be coming up either tomorrow or Wednesday! I hope you understand 🙂
Lots of love